There was a pastoral retreat and three of them gathered to pray for one another, and one says:
"Well, as I know this is between us, I confess that I have a weakness is that I like look at women ... are my temptation. Pray for me.
Then another says
"Well, I admit that my weakness is to take some money from the offering ...
Then these two ask the third, and the answers:
"Well, I have a tiny weakness, and I'm too gossip and do not wait to tell everyone what I have heard ...
[This is a true joke.] A brother was accustomed to falling asleep during the service. He used to sit on the bench and close my eyes. But one day, during a service, power failure, leaving everything dark, and that this brother wakes up and starts crying saying Brothers cry, cry out that I was blind! .
Al die and go to heaven a pastor and a taxi driver (who had been neighbors and friends on earth) are taken their eternal dwellings, the pastor is in awe as the driver is installed a house with swimming pool, tennis court and the whole thing! while he was on an ordinary house.
- Sir! but this is? All my life I preached thy word above the ground and see what I do!
"When you preach I only heard people snoring, but could have seen how people prayed fervently when the driver was driving!
The teacher asked Louie, How David killed Goliath? With an engine! responded the child. What do you mean with a motor? Do not know if it was with a slingshot? "the teacher said. The boy replied, "Ahhh! I did not know the brand had to say! "
A brother is a street singing very passionately.
"Send fire, Lord, send fire." . .
In its journey passes in front of a garage where a gasoline tank welded. The tank was waste and a spark caused an explosion. The cylinder shoots and engulfed in flames toward the brother, who ran to see him, now singing. . .
- "I was only joking, Lord, just kidding...
A missionary in Africa was on a road and met a lion tremendote .
first thing that came to mind was to "walk in heels," but decided not to run for no more incite the beast to persecute him.
knelt in the road and began to pray more fervently than ever. The beast approached him and started hitting the cold nose sniffing her cheek. The missionary was shaking and would not even open his eyes. After a moment of sweaty prayer missionary felt that the beast had retreated a bit.
opened his eyes and saw the hairy animal was kneeling in front of him staring at him. Then the missionary told him: "Brother Leo, how happy I am to have you join me in this prayer meeting."
Neither short nor lazy lion replied: "Shut your mouth! I'm just giving thanks for the food!"
A thief when he was peering through the kitchen and headed toward the dining room looking for the silver, he heard a voice saying: Jesus is watching you!
The thief was startled, turned off the flashlight and immediately went to find out where that voice came out.
- Jesus is watching you! (He returned to listen). So again lit his flashlight and saw a parrot in a cage that he repeated:
- Jesus is watching you!
The thief laughed and replied:
"And you, Who are you?
The parrot answered:
- I'm Moses!
To which the thief replied, standing:
- And who was the idiot who put a parrot Moses?
And the bird said
"The same idiot who put" Jesus "the Doberman who is behind you ...!!!
Asked one Christian to another: How to be your girlfriend? and the other responds, as the will of God "good, acceptable, and perfect."
A Christian who started a business as owner of a funeral prayer requests in a time of intercession in the church and says: I want to pray for my business succeed, not that I want anyone to die but I want business to prosper.
a new believer, the Bible talks a lot about Peter and Paul but why he never mentions Vilma and Betty?